love these earrings color pop
Tonight I pulled down a journal from 2003. I was on the search for a quote and steered in the direction of the tattered leather bound. I wasn’t prepared for what I found. My stomach is still fluttering. Snippets of me at twenty-six: postcards, stamps, letters from friends, poems, crayon drawing cut outs, colorful ink. It is a trip. That year I was piecing myself back together after a rather sad break up and knee surgery. I took a small detour in the name of recovery. I moved to Germany for six months under the wings of family and journal keeping was daily. Life was this in a nutshell: “There is a silence here, a polished gleaming quiet punctuated by fog horns from the sea.” SARK
Looking back it was a beautiful experience however humbling and full of unknown.
Back to this flutter in my belly. All through out the journal there are nudges that hint to my life now. And to think the whole time I was on my way and had a total blank stare on 'em. Life is such a wonder like that. Indulge me and stay for a few that spun me happy.
this years mug purchase at the fair
a random scribble:
cheering, sipping coffee and talking in the bright colors
I wonder when it will be time to fall in love again? I wonder who he is and what he's doing right now? Maybe the butterflies and the feeling of fall & other places are a sign of him. Maybe he is around the next corner? (2010 update: The funny thing here is that I had already met my husband when I wrote those words but I wouldn't have a clue about that until 2009. You know what's coincidence? My then friend Matt (hehe. he is my husband now) he was the one signed up to pick me up from the airport when I returned from this trip. Isn't that wild? It's funny how life works out.)
And then there's this letter from a dear friend professing love (scotched taped directly into journal). It gave me that wide smile that occurs when someone says something from the heart and it moves you to hear it.
“…I think maybe too it was seeing your show at UT. Seeing your art, framed like that, and liking it. Knowing you were going to Alaska. Seeing that side of you, and liking that too. I had sensed the power in you, but never really been able to see it so clearly. To see who you were as a person, strong, fearless, and passionate…”
In an card from my mom and dad:
“…leave your mark on the world through the creation of your art and through healing hands. “
Every person we need is in front of us. Every opportunity we need is in front of us.
North: We look to the North for emotional, physical and mental health. Lay down on the mother earth with your navel toward her and your head to the North. We can still receive healing energy from this earth.
Owning the present can influence the future.
-John Kabat Zinn
I dreamt last night of the aurora borealis and pure air to breathe. I felt suspended, content and blissful.